Idolatry: Big word, small acts.

It’s January 4 — first Friday of 2013 — and God has already warned me of my idolatrous tendencies (or habits).

Listen to the Bible from 1 Kings 11:1-13

Solomon’s Wives

11 King Solomon, however, loved many foreign women besides Pharaoh’s daughter—Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Sidonians and Hittites. ² They were from nations about which the Lord had told the Israelites, “You must not intermarry with them, because they will surely turn your hearts after their gods.” Nevertheless, Solomon held fast to them in love. ³ He had seven hundred wives of royal birth and three hundred concubines, and his wives led him astray.⁴ As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the Lord his God, as the heart of David his father had been. ⁵ He followed Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and Molek the detestable god of the Ammonites. ⁶ So Solomon did evil in the eyes of the Lord; he did not follow the Lord completely, as David his father had done.

⁷ On a hill east of Jerusalem, Solomon built a high place for Chemosh the detestable god of Moab, and for Molek the detestable god of the Ammonites. ⁸ He did the same for all his foreign wives, who burned incense and offered sacrifices to their gods.

⁹ The Lord became angry with Solomon because his heart had turned away from the Lord, the God of Israel, who had appeared to him twice.¹⁰ Although he had forbidden Solomon to follow other gods, Solomon did not keep the Lord’s command.¹¹ So the Lord said to Solomon, “Since this is your attitude and you have not kept my covenant and my decrees, which I commanded you, I will most certainly tear the kingdom away from you and give it to one of your subordinates. ¹² Nevertheless, for the sake of David your father, I will not do it during your lifetime. I will tear it out of the hand of your son. ¹³ Yet I will not tear the whole kingdom from him, but will give him one tribe for the sake of David my servant and for the sake of Jerusalem, which I have chosen.”

Solomon was the wisest man EVER, the Bible says so, and yet he wasn’t immune to his own humanity. Idolatry is such  a big word, no saint would wanna be labeled “idolatrous.” Yet, the smallest acts, desires, and emotional whims that we do, long for, and cherish embody the word “idolatry” fully.

I hate to admit it, and I hate to confront it even more, but I am probably the most idolatrous person I know. God knows that, and I guess that’s why early this year He’s already cautioning me about it.

That’s the hardest part. I already know it. Like Solomon, I also know of what God wants for me — not totally, but I know the generals well enough. I know of the commandment that says: “You shall have no other gods before Me.” (Exodus 20:3) I know myself well enough to know which things I do are undeniably idolatrous. And like Solomon, I have talked about holding on to God’s commands.

He exclaims this in the presence of his people in 1 Kings 8: 56-61 and says,

⁵⁶ “Praise be to the Lord, who has given rest to His people Israel just as He promised. Not one word has failed of all the good promises He gave through His servant Moses.⁵⁷ May the Lord our God be with us as He was with our ancestors; may He never leave us nor forsake us. ⁵⁸ May He turn our hearts to Him, to walk in obedience to Him and keep the commands, decrees and laws He gave our ancestors.⁵⁹ And may these words of mine, which I have prayed before the Lord, be near to the Lord our God day and night, that He may uphold the cause of His servant and the cause of His people Israel according to each day’s need, ⁶⁰ so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the Lord is God and that there is no other.⁶¹ And may your hearts be fully committed to the Lord our God, to live by His decrees and obey His commands, as at this time.”

I’m afraid of how the future might be for me. I really am. Though I should not be, I have to admit I am. I may not be as wise as Solomon, but I am wise enough to see what He wants of me — an undivided heart. I am afraid that like Solomon, despite knowing these, I would still go my way and break His heart.

It makes me wanna put a different spin on the statement “He that is in me, is greater than he that is in the world.” Right now? I’m convicted to declare…

He that is in me is greater than he THAT IS ME.

I am my worst enemy. I bet a lot of you saints out there feel the same way. It’s not that the enemy’s lies are powerful, it’s not that they have power over us beyond what we can deal with — it’s that we have decided to listen to and cherish those lies.

The spirit is willing but the body in indeed weak. YET in all these? We have to remind ourselves that WE ARE MORE THAN CONQUERORS THROUGH HIM WHO LOVED US .(Rom. 8:37)

By the cross, by Christ’s sacrifice, by His power, by His love, and ultimately by His grace — WE CAN OVERCOME.

I urge you saints to admit your idolatrous ways. Search within and see where you are weakest. AND COMMIT YOURSELF TO PRAYER. We have no power aside from that which is ours through Christ — and we need to tap into that power EVERY MOMENT of our lives. Do not underestimate the power of prayer, and do not discount the need for total humility and submission. In prayer, we surrender ourselves and submit to His power and call for His will to be done.

Don’t get me wrong, I am in no position to say I have totally overcome myself. Nor am I in any way better than any of you — remember, I am the prodigal saint, I have a wandering heart that strays way too often. I am talking to you as a brother who cautions and reminds you of what I have been reminded so that together we will overcome.

I guess what I’m trying to say is:

1) Idolatry is a serious issue we better deal with NOW.

2) I am battling it, and I need your prayer and support. 

Honestly, I am thankful for the reminder. Very early in the year God has already cautioned me. I pray that I can hold fast to this reminder though. I pray that His mercy and grace be ever with me as I battle it out with myself.

Just remember, saints, it’s not about being religious and ritually righteous. It’s about having a heart that seeks to love and build a relationship with our Savior and Lord Jesus Christ who came to seek and save us who were lost.

You were as I, tempted and tried… human.

This line just kept playing in my head for the WHOLE week (in fact, I think it’s been like this for two weeks)!

I don’t remember the whole song, just this line. I just keep singing it in my head:

“You were as I tempted and tried. Human.”

Tonight, He finally told me why.

***

theprodigalsaint: “You were as I, tempted and tried — human.”

God: Oh, so you’re still singing that?

theprodigalsaint: I can’t get it out of my head! 

God: Do you know why?

theprodigalsaint: Well, it’s definitely a reminder that there’s no excuse for my sins — even You, in the form of Jesus, were tempted but remained sinless.

God: Well, I was still God during My time on earth.

theprodigalsaint:  True, but You were also completely man.

God: True. Hey, what song are you gonna present for Easter again?

theprodigalsaint: Huh? Oh, “No Greater Love”

God: You have a solo part right? I made sure you were given that part, what part was it.

theprodigalsaint: It’s — :’)

[No Greater Love is a Cantata by John Piper about the life of Jesus. I was given the part of Jesus being tempted in the desert. It was a duet using the tempter’s words and Jesus’s responses — I was singing Jesus’s responses. ♥]

***

Jesus was fully human and fully God; He too was tempted and tried — EVEN BY SATAN HIMSELF!

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. (Matt. 4:1)

***

theprodigalsaint: Now I get it! But isn’t that what I said? You kept putting this line, not even the whole song, in my head to remind me that I am supposed to follow in Your footsteps — not fall into sin. 

God: Mm-hmm. But that’s not all. What else did you sing about?

theprodigalsaint: Well, I was singing the things You — :’)

***

Jesus, when He was being tempted by Satan, defended Himself — with God’s word.

Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’” (Matt. 4:4)

Jesus answered him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’” (Matt. 4:7)

Jesus said to him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only.’” (Matt. 4: 10)

He held on to God’s word. He knew what He was to do — obey God ONLY and FULLY.

***

theprodigalsaint: Well, Lord, it’s not that easy. Sure, I want to hold on to Your words too. I also have enough knowledge of Your words to be able to defend against the sins Satan commonly tempts me with. But…

God: But it’s not that easy because ‘I just can’t understand how there are things that you humans crave for so much that it’s become a physical pain?” or that ‘I don’t understand that there are things that you humans are prone too? Your emotions, your flesh’s desires, your socially constructed constraints, etc?’ 

theprodigalsaint: Yes, Lord! Yes! Exactly!

God: Son, why don’t you read the passage again.

***

Jesus had to deal with Satan like most of us. He, was COMPLETELY human after all.

After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.” (Matt. 4:2-3)

***

God: Did you see it?

theprodigalsaint: Yes.

God: So…?

theprodigalsaint: When You were tempted, you were tempted with something categorically similar to everything I’m tempted with … I mean, the circumstances are the same.

God: Mm-hmm, go on?

theprodigalsaint: When I am tempted, it’s SO easy to fall when I’m tired and/or stressed. Emotionally unstable because of physical weariness. It’s hard to focus, to think first before I act, let alone to ponder upon Your word before falling into Satan’s trap.

God: And at that time?

theprodigalsaint: Jesus was hungry and tired — He was in the desert for 40 days and 40 nights! And He was tempted with food.

God: But?

theprodigalsaint: But what?

God: You were thinking of  a “but,” what is it?

theprodigalsaint: Well, He was FASTING after all, so that means He was spiritually recharged at that time. He was in communion with You! He was praying and all. He definitely was spiritually ready, and probably even mentally, to take Satan head on!

God: Sure, He was filled by the Spirit at that time. And yes, He was in communion with Me at that time. So what does that tell you?

theprodigalsaint:  … that if I were to spend my days seeking and communing with You CONSTANTLY, I will be able to draw on Your strength too, like how Jesus was spiritually ready to battle Satan, even when He was physically drained.

 God: And?

theprodigalsaint: And that no amount of physical craving or limitation would be able to weaken a Saint empowered by the Spirit — Your Spirit.

God: So now are you convinced that I really understand how you feel? How temptations appeal to your certain ‘perceived’ needs? Jesus was extremely hungry at that time, but He didn’t give in. He was SO tired, stones to bread would’ve been an easy way out of things. 

theprodigalsaint: He knew that there are greater things than just this fleshly body we’re bound in. He knew He had a higher purpose to fulfill: to bring You glory and to overcome sin and death. Turning stones to bread would not accomplish anything, in terms of His mission. That action won’t glorify You. Besides, if He were to do that, He’s be obeying and pleasing Satan — He knew what You want. He had the power in Him, but He knew you won’t allow Him too, why? Because there’s no purpose to it.

God: Sounds familiar?

theprodigalsaint: There are a LOT of things I know You can give me, I know I can do, and I know I can get — But I have to always trust in Your plan and focus on being goal oriented.

God: Goal oriented?

theprodigalsaint: Focused on one goal, and one goal alone, doing only things that please You. 

God: I think I’ve already told you that sometime ago, right?

theprodigalsaint: Yup. It went something like: There really is no such thing as right and wrong — only what pleases and displeases God — You.

God: There’s something else…

theprodigalsaint: hmm?

God: Son, I want you to be like Me. More and more like Me — like Jesus. He held on to My word, never let go. I  kept playing that line in your head to remind you that YOU ARE CAPABLE of doing what I did when I was on earth — be FOCUSED! Son, I don’t want you to just remember My words in times of temptation — I want you to be able to focus on My word in EVERYTHING. You need Me, you know that. And I want to help you too, and this is My way of telling you how. Stick close to Me, walk with Me — ALWAYS. Always means ALWAYS, right?

theprodigalsaint: I haven’t been giving much thought to what You want for everything, have I?

God: Mm-hmm,

theprodigalsaint: And that lead to a very slow but constant drift away from You. Slowly, yet definitely surely, I was making decisions on my own, focusing on things I want. Not that I was focusing on huge decisions, but just things like how to spend my afternoon, where to eat for lunch, what to eat for dinner, how to talk with my friends, how to deal with classmates, how to act on the bus, how to… etcetcetc. The more I got used to mundane things and mundane decisions made everyday — the more callous I became to You. When the time came that I needed to cling to You and let go of what I want and focus on what You want, I was already too used to listening to myself.

God: So what do you plan to do now?

theprodigalsaint: Pray, ask, and focus — I mean, just ask.

God: Ask?

theprodigalsaint: Ask for Your help and Your empowerment — that I may be focused. I cannot do all these on my own, I am too weak. BUT! There is power in You. 🙂

God: *chuckles* I love you, son.

theprodigalsaint: and I couldn’t be happier >:D< Love you too!

***

P.S. Here’s the song, thanks to Google, I finally found out what song it was!

Lead Me to the Cross — Hillsongs

Apologies vs. Repentance

SAINTS! LISTEN UP!

I’ve been talking with a dear Christian sister about our struggles with being human, with always falling short of His glory, and with always sinning and giving in to temptation. We talked about God’s grace being sufficient, and His love never ending; BUT that doesn’t mean we can just go on sinning. We came to a conclusion that goes:

“It’s only by His grace that we are saved, and in that we should put our faith and trust on. That doesn’t mean we should go about our shortcomings like a cycle of God-forgives so we-forget. What the stories in the Bible are telling us is that God is a God of second chances, and that He wants us to repent–sincerely repent. And to ask Him for grace not to be waived off our sins again, but to teach us to change, the way He wants us to.”

Then it hit me: Have I been repenting, or only apologizing?

In the Oxford English Dictionary (Online) to repent is defined as:

“To review one’s actions and feel contrition or regret for something one has done or omitted to do; (esp. in religious contexts) to acknowledge the sinfulness of one’s past action or conduct by showing sincere remorse and undertaking to reform in the future.”

(“repent, v.”. OED Online. December 2011. Oxford University Press. 22 February 2012 <http://www.oed.com/view/Entry/162742?rskey=EXLQZ8&result=4&isAdvanced=false&gt;.)

For the most part, I’ve only been apologizing: saying SORRY. That’s not what God wants!

Sure, He is pleased that we acknowledge our shortcomings and our faults and that we express remorse for them; but that’s not enough. He asks for REPENTANCE not APOLOGIES. Apologies are great, they are the first step to repentance: recognizing that we are wrong and that we need help; but repentance goes further than that. Repentance entails a complete turn around — we stop walking in the direction we’re going, and turn back to go to where He wants us to go! Apology is just stopping in our tracks and staying there, that’s not what He wants.

From that time on Jesus began to preach, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven has come near.” (Matthew 4:17)

Jesus did not say “Apologize for your sins! For the kingdom of heaven has come near.” NO, He said: REPENT.

Also, listen to Paul in Acts 20:21, he says:

I have declared to both Jews and Greeks that they must turn to God in repentance and have faith in our Lord Jesus.

He did not tell the Jews and the Greeks to “turn to God and apologize,” he said REPENT.

When we sin and then repent, we are just doing what we’re supposed to: we fall, so we have to get up. However, abuse of His grace comes when we sin and we just keep apologizing and think we’re OKAY by virtue of His grace.

Apology is not repentance, if it were, Jesus would’ve used apologize in His preaching.

I, and everyone else, am not abusing God’s grace when I genuinely repent. I feel bad about taking His grace for granted because I only have “apology” in mind. If you’ve always been feeling guilty about constantly sinning and then saying sorry, then fellow saint, that must be God bugging you saying: Child, I don’t need your apologies, I want your repentance. Repentance means DOING something; it’s turning AWAY from our sins — not just saying sorry for them.

Now I will echo John the Baptist’s call: REPENT! 

The Saint Communes: Listen, flee.

“Son, I’ve been telling you. You are not meant to confront temptations HEAD ON. As much as My salvation for you is complete and victorious — you still are in this world. Yes, you are a saint, you are My saint. But as you know, even as a saint, you still are HUMAN. Son, part of your humanity is your sinful nature. I’ve freed you from it, but I do not offer instantaneous change. You need to learn.What good is your perfection if you did not learn from the process?

I want you to learn, I want you to change, but I do not want robots. Son, you of all people should know how good having someone love you feels like. I want OBEDIENCE OUT OF LOVE. I do not need machines that I can program and reset when they mess up. I want people who would follow Me, choose to obey Me, and hold on to Me.

You, My son, are a saint. I’ve set you apart from the world to be ambassadors of My love on earth. And son, how do you expect to do that when you keep falling? I am not expecting you to be perfect, I know your limitations, and I know how to test you. Every time you encounter temptation, I provide a way out.

Son, I give fire exits to burning buildings, not portal guns that can zap you places. I need you to make the conscious effort of FLEEING. No son, a burning building cannot be salvaged by cans of fire extinguishers, you have to flee from it — you are not equipped to fight it. Your sinful nature always keeps you vulnerable to being tempted; however, My grace is sufficient for you. Turn to Me, I can help you. I’m the fire fighter that rushed to climb the burning inferno of a building you’re trapped in to save you. Just choose to take my hand and let’s go. No, no, no. How many times do I have to tell you? Stop trying to fight the flames. You cannot win, not at your current state. You are not equipped, nor trained, to fight flames of this intensity. Listen to Me, My child, flee.

Son, you will always be tempted. You cannot just sit around all day and hope to not encounter any. The devil is like a roaring lion, seeking those he can devour. Don’t be sitting duck! Flee at the sight of him! In cases like these, fleeing is not cowardly, it’s wise. Sure, in severe cases, even in the wild, some prey gets to overpower their predator. But for the most part, even if they can, they’d much rather run away — it’s safer, more efficient, and saves a lot of trouble. PLUS! It’s a guaranteed safe option for them. If you run, and you get caught — then fight. But if you fight and you realize the opponent’s too strong, can you still run?

Son, being bound by your sinful nature is like swimming with an open wound in shark territory. They will always be able to find you, so keep swimming! Don’t laze around and hope they don’t find you. FLEE! I will never leave you nor forsake you, and your battles can be won with My power. BUT, you have to remember, I am not your guard dog. I am your Father. I will protect you when I need to, BUT, you HAVE TO OBEY ME. Run when I tell you.   I’ve made it clear in a lot of ways in the Bible to flee from temptation, to flee from the devil. Listen to me, child. FLEE!

Look at every time you get caught by temptation because you did not flee and tried to fight when I clearly commanded you to run. Every time that happens, the enemy succeeds in destroying you, your morale, your well-being, etc. What’s worse? I am the only one who can heal you and make you whole again, BUT you feel so dirty and broken that you assume I would not want you anymore! Look at the LIES you’re vulnerable to when you give in to temptation, when you allow the prowling lion to get a hold of you. Son, he is full of hate, he is miserable — and he sees how happy you are in me AND HE WANTS TO DESTROY THAT RELATIONSHIP! Do not, My son, allow him to do that.

Listen to your Father. “

— Love, God

“Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.” (2 Timothy 2:22)

Whatever it is that’s “pulling you away from God,” as a friend of mine once said, never allow it to take over you. Always seek Him, and He will always be there for you to find. And as the verse says, “along with those who call on the Lord” — we can all work together at this, to help each other find our way back to our Father, and to STAY with Him.

In Jesus’s Name, we HAVE victory!